Better Late Than Never
by Honey1Lemon
Summary: Emma thought that she was fine being alone, that is until she met Killian Jones. This is the story of long car rides, late night hot chocolate, and learning to let a little magic into your life. (AU)
1. Chapter 1: Then Came You

Then Came You

Emma hated weddings.

Everything from the same overplayed songs she heard most weekends to the cheesy, tearful speeches annoyed her endlessly. Yet what she hated most was happening to her right at that very moment.

"Waitress!" A middle aged man, who was fat around the middle and holding a drink in the air sloshing the remaining liquid over the sides of the glass and down his arm called out to her. She pushed down the rage that was bursting to get out and replaced it with what she hoped resembled a smile more than a grimace.

"Yes, sir?" Emma questioned fighting the urge to grab the drink out of his hand and hit him over the head with it.

"Could you be a doll and get me a few more of those stuffed banana peppers?"

She smiled again, "I'll check in the kitchens and see if there are any left."

As she turned away she felt a swift swat to her butt and the man saying "That's a girl."

She stalked off to the kitchen in a rage trying to calm herself by counting backwards, slowly from ten, just like Mary Margaret had always told her to do. As if Mary Margaret wouldn't have aimed a well-deserved punch to the man's nose for touching her ass. She breathed a sigh of relief as she opened the kitchen door just as Uptown Girl started to play.

This is not where Emma Swan pictured her life to be at 31 years old. Just ten years ago she was named Promising New Chef of the year and was on her way to success and stardom and since all of that came crashing down around her, she found herself waitressing for a catering company, not even trusted enough to make the canapes.

Rather than looking for the stuffed banana peppers, Emma decided she needed a break and went out the backdoor of the banquet hall to get some air. She took a seat on the curb and took out a cigarette and lighter from her apron. She closed her eyes as she inhaled and felt a calming relief washing over her body.

* * *

Killian loved weddings.

He mostly loved finding a single bridesmaid to take home for the night and the open bars. However seeing as this was his brother Liam's wedding and he was the best man it seemed like it would be frowned upon to overindulge. That, however, did not mean that he hadn't been eyeing the leggy brunette who was introduced as Claire's cousin the entire evening.

"Don't even think about it," came his older brother Liam's voice from behind him. Killian cocked his head to the side and feigned innocence, "I don't even know what you are talking about mate." Liam rolled his eyes as he took a seat next to his younger brother. "Claire told me to tell you that you can't sleep with any of her friends or family members, especially Danielle," Liam said motioning towards the leggy brunette with his head.

"You guys take all the fun out of life," Killian muttered and he took a swig from his beer. Liam laughed and put his hand on his brother's shoulder, "This could be you next you know," he said.

"What? A short twat in a tuxedo? I'll pass," Killian retorted taking another swig from his beer and finding Danielle across the dancefloor laughing with some of the bridesmaids.

"Don't be an ass. Married, I mean, and happy." Liam told him and when Killian didn't respond he added, "Milah was five years ago Killian, she would have wanted you to be happy."

Killian shrugged his brother's hand from his shoulder and began to stand up, "She would have wanted to be alive…I'm going outside for a bit, I need some air." Liam simply shook his head feeling hopeless and watched his brother make his way towards the back exit, wishing his brother would find happiness and stop feeling so guilty.

Killian burst out the backdoor and felt relief as the air touched his face. He closed his eyes and breathed in the cold January air. When he opened his eyes he noticed the blonde waitress from the reception sitting on the curb and smoking a cigarette. He walked up to her and took a seat, "Mind giving me one of those?" he asked.

She turned and looked at him, seemingly annoyed from being interrupted from her thoughts. She dug into her apron and handed him a single cigarette and a bright pink lighter. Killian lit it and handed the lighter back to the blonde, "thanks love," he added turning on the charm once he saw that she was attractive.

He stuck the lit cigarette behind his ear and stuck out his hand, "Killian Jones, pleasure to meet you darling."

The blonde threw her cigarette on the ground and crushed it with her shoe and went to take his extended hand when the backdoor slammed open hitting against the brick.

A thoroughly harassed women in her late fifties by the look of her appeared in the doorway, "Emma, I am not paying you to take smoke breaks! The cake needs cut! Let's go."

The blonde, Emma, muttered a sorry that wasn't really directed at anyone and followed the woman into the building without sparing a second look at Killian.

Killian finished the cigarette and slowly made his way back into the wedding in time to see his brother and new sister smashing cake into each others faces. Their happiness was infectious, and deep down Killian craved the kind of love Liam and Claire shared, even though he would never admit it to himself.

* * *

Emma followed Greta back into the kitchen and began slicing wedding cake for the guests. She didn't know why but in her head she kept replaying the phrase "Killian Jones, pleasure to meet you darling." From the short interaction, Emma could tell what type of man he was, a playboy. An attractive one at that, she admitted to herself but still a playboy and one that she would avoid for the rest of the evening.

This turned out to be harder than she expected. Throughout the rest of the night whenever they made eye contact he threw little winks her way. She rolled her eyes in response.

As Emma watched the couple's final dance from the shadows she felt a pang of sadness that she could not explain.

"Sickening isn't it," commented a voice from over her shoulder. She turned her head and saw Killian Jones standing there. Emma simply shrugged but didn't say anything.

"They have been like this since the day they met," Killian continued clearly not phased from her silence. Emma still didn't say anything but instead watched as the groom planted a kiss on his bride's forehead as they danced.

"They seem happy," Emma finally commented as the groom spun the now giggling bride around.

"Aye," Killian said simply before downing his drink and setting the now empty cup on a nearby table. They both stood in silence for a few more moments as the couple finished their last dance of the evening.

"I have to get back to work," She said quickly rushing off towards the kitchen as she heard him call "Emma" after her.

Emma hid in the kitchen cleaning while the rest of the staff brought her dirty dishes to wash. She popped her head outside the kitchen door around midnight and was relieved to see that all of the guests had left, and was extra relieved when there was no sign of Killian Jones either.


	2. Chapter 2: Promises Promises

Promises Promises 

_The next day_

Emma stifled a yawn as she poured coffee into one of her customer's mugs, accidentally overfilling the mug when she wasn't paying attention.

"Oh god, I'm sorry Gus," Emma said wiping up the spilled coffee with a towel. She was exhausted, she didn't get to bed until well after 2 a.m. and had to be up a short four hours later for her shift at the diner.

"Don't worry about it," Gus, a regular said gruffly drinking the steaming coffee.

"Quit burning the customers Emma," Emma turned around to see one of her best friends Ruby smiling at her as she tied her apron around her waist.

"Ha ha," Emma retorted sarcastically. She and Ruby had been best friends for the past few years ever since she moved to Boston.

"Meet any cute guys at the wedding?" Ruby questioned.

"No," Emma said bluntly.

"What a waste," Ruby said to which Emma rolled her eyes.

Since Emma had met Ruby she was always keen to set her up with guys and showed too much of an interest in her sex life if Emma was being honest.

The last time Emma was set up with a guy Ruby knew she ended up climbing out of the bathroom window at the restaurant to avoid him pawing all over her. Between Ruby and her other friend Mary Margaret she had probably been set up on blind dates with half of the men in Boston and they could not understand why she found flaws in every last one of them.

The truth was that Emma didn't want a relationship, she was fine being alone, content without a man in her life. Her last seriously relationship had been nine years ago and that ended with a stint in prison and losing her job. Since that day she vowed never to let someone that close to her heart again.

"Well I met a guy," Ruby announced to Emma unsolicited.

"Yeah," Emma responded uninterested.

"Yeah," Ruby started mistaking Emma's expression for one of intrigue, "His name is Robin and he's…well he's gorgeous."

Emma scoffed. "Well he is, and he's an EMT, and you are going to meet him tomorrow. I said we would go watch his pick-up hockey game." She didn't even have the decency to feign sheepishness when she told Emma the last part.

Emma couldn't believe her best friend. "How does your promising to watch a bunch of grown men play a stupid hockey game translate into me also going to watch a bunch of grown men play a stupid hockey game?" Emma questioned as she buttered two pieces of wheat toast for a customer.

Ruby shot her a pair of sad eyes, "Please Em. I would do it for you."

Emma let out a laugh, "I would never ask you to."

"Oh come on Emma, what other plans do you have?"

"I might have a hot date," Emma retorted avoiding Ruby's gaze when she shot her a yeah right look.

"Liar," Ruby said accusingly as she put a piece of apple pie down on the counter with more force than was necessary.

"Well, yes I am lying but," Emma started to say before Ruby cut her off.

"So you will go," Ruby exclaimed hugging her friend, "oh Emma you are the best."

Emma just laughed, "Only if you stop hugging me." Ruby put her hands up in surrender. Emma was always getting sucked in Ruby's elaborate schemes. Most of the times that included some guy that she was seeing that current week. Ruby did not share Emma's sentiments when it came to love, Ruby's main goal in life was to fall in love as many times as possible and viewed a broken heart as only a minor setback.

* * *

 _buzz buzz buzz_

Killian flipped over and pulled the sheet over his head.

 _buzz buzz buzz_

He groaned and felt around blindly for his phone.

"What," he barked into the phone not bothering to look who was on the other end.

"Well hello to you to Sunshine," came the voice of one of his best friends Robin. Killian sat up in bed and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes with one hand, he glanced at the clock on his dresser it read 1:14 p.m. in red blocked numbers.

"What do you need Robin?" Killian questioned standing up and admiring his tousled hair in the mirror. He was less pleased with the dark circles that framed his blue eyes staring back at him.

"I need you to play goalie tomorrow, Jamie's wife is in the hospital having her baby," Robin told him.

"No way I'm bullocks as keeper," Killian exclaimed. He heard Robin chuckle on the other end, "its goalie Killian, we aren't in England and this isn't soccer."

"Why can't you do it?" Killian questioned as he paced back and forth through his bright lit bedroom.

"Because that's why. Please just do it," Robin pleaded with one of his oldest friends.

Killian laughed, "You are bringing a bird along aren't you?" Robin didn't say anything for a few seconds before he weakly said yes.

"Fine," Killian finally conceded, "Text me the details."

After hanging up with Robin he made his way into the bathroom to take something for his aching head. Maybe he did end up overindulging last night he thought to himself as he swallowed the pain killer and washed it down with water straight from the sink.

At 33 years old, Killian Jones believed that he was living the life, he had nothing to tie him down and could do what he pleased when he pleased. He was working his dream job as an EMT alongside his best mate Robin, and last night he watched his brother and only living relative get married.

While Killian loved his life, he was often fretted over by his brother and friends who were settling down in serious relationships and having babies and thought Killian was missing something.

Killian accepted that the chance of love and a family he once had died with Milah. He would never find another woman like her, and he convinced himself that he didn't want to find another woman to share his life with.


	3. Chapter 3: Typical Behavior

Typical Behavior  


Emma sat in car, fixing her hair in the mirror and singing along to the song currently playing on the radio. She was waiting on Ruby to come down from her apartment so they could go watch her latest guy's hockey game. In typical Ruby fashion she had left Emma waiting for over ten minutes now.

She was shaken from her thoughts when she heard a door slam in the distance. Ruby was walking towards her wearing a Boston Bruins jersey, skin tight black jeans, and boots that had at least a five inch heel despite the snow that was currently covering the steps she was making her way down.

"I didn't know you were such a hockey fan Ruby," Emma commented to Ruby smirking as she entered the small yellow car.

"I'm more of a Robin fan, plus I wanted to fit in," Ruby told her pulling down the visor to check her makeup in the mirror.

"People usually don't wear hooker boots to hockey games," Emma said as she put the car in drive and began going down the snowy street. Ruby shot her a dirty look then stuck her tongue out at Emma. "So how did you guys meet, you didn't tell me yesterday," Emma said changing the subject.

"Through David actually, apparently they know each other through work or something. He said that he's a really great guy," Ruby said adding more crimson lipstick to her lips as she did. David was the husband of their friend Mary Margaret and was a police officer.

Two hours later Emma found herself seated next to a thoroughly smitten Ruby who kept blowing kisses at Robin and giggling when he would wink at her from the ice. Emma kept glancing at the clock counting down the minutes until she could go home and curl up with her book and a cup of hot chocolate in bed.

"Isn't this exciting," Ruby gushed to Emma without taking her eyes off of Robin who had just shot the puck narrowly missing the net.

"Thrilling," Emma mumbled sarcastically. In reality she could think of about 40 things that would have been more exciting, washing dishes, scrubbing the toilet, pulling of her thumb nails. Emma was not a sports fan, she didn't get it and she didn't care to.

Ruby sent Robin another kiss and Emma thought that she heard one of his teammates say in an annoyed fashion "Oh brother." It was clear that his teammates were getting annoyed with his antics, especially when he plowed is teammate over when trying to show off for Ruby.

When the game ended, Robin's team had won 3-2 even after a subpar performance by their goalie, Emma had followed Ruby down to the player's bench.

"Good game Robin," Emma heard one of the players call.

"Thanks, it would have been a shut out if it wasn't for old Jones here," Robin said motioning to the goalie who was skating towards the bench.

"Oi, I told you that I'm rubbish at this," the goalie retorted as his took his helmet off, Emma felt her heart skip a beat. It was the guy who wouldn't leave her alone at the wedding from the other night.

"Hey Emma," he called out to her throwing an annoying wink her way.

"You know each other," came Robin and Ruby at the same time.

"No," said Emma bluntly.

"Yes," said Killian at the exact same time. Emma felt her face go red.

"We met once," Emma said simply shrugging her shoulders as if to say it wasn't a big deal.

"And she has been dreaming about me nonstop since, it's okay love, no need to be bashful," Killian said smiling as he ran his hand through his sweaty hair.

"You wish," Emma countered feeling her face go even redder if it was possible.

"Alright, alright Killian don't scare the poor girl off, anyway Ruby and I were thinking about getting some drinks tonight with some of the guys," Robin said breaking up the argument that was itching to break out.

"Yeah, okay," Emma said feeling that a drink was exactly what she needed in her life.

"Sounds good mate, just let me shower. Try not to think about me naked Emma," he said his shockingly blue eyes sparkling mischievously as he took off to the locker room.

"He is the most insufferable human I have ever met," Emma huffed as she and Ruby made their way to her car. They were going to meet up at the bar with Robin and a few of the other guys from the team.

"He's hot and he's just flirting with you," Ruby offered as she opened the car door.

"I don't want him to flirt with me," Emma burst out locking eyes with Ruby across the roof of the car.

Ruby rolled her eyes, "Oh lighten up. Now let's go get a drink please."

* * *

"So you know Emma," Killian asked Robin in what he hoped was a casual voice as her pulled a t-shirt over his head and threw his dirty jersey into the black gym bag that was opened at his feet.

Robin laughed, "Well today was the first day I met her, but I know that she is Ruby's best friend and works at the diner with her. How do you know her?" He added.

"Met her at Liam's wedding." Killian said simply.

"And," Robin added knowing that nothing in Killian's life was as simple as that.

"And I'm interested in her, she's bloody gorgeous if you haven't noticed," Killian said putting on his leather jacket and throwing his gym bag over his shoulder.

"Well from what Ruby has said I take it that she doesn't really date," Robin added nonchalantly.

"That was until she met me," Killian said smiling.

"Oh yeah," Robin laughed following Killian out of the locker room, "You're a regular old prince charming."

When Killian and Robin arrived at the bar he saw Emma and Ruby sitting at the bar with drinks in their hands. Emma stuck out in the dark room with her bright red leather jacket and blonde hair that was now tied up in a messy bun. She was one of the only girls who didn't have makeup caked on her face, it was a subdued confidence that she had that Killian found really attractive.

"Ladies," Robin said inclining his head at Emma and smiling at Ruby. Ruby laughed and pointed to a seat the she had saved beside her.

"Who else is coming tonight?" She questioned Robin as she took a sip of her orange drink that had a pineapple impaled on a toothpick in it.

"Actually everyone else bailed, but no worries we will have a great time." He answered planting a kiss on her cheek.

Killian heard Emma make a small retching sound as she witnessed this and Killian laughed. He pulled up a seat beside her and ordered a beer from the bartender.

The evening passed much of the same way the hockey game did, with Robin and Ruby flirting however without the glass and ice separating them they were also having trouble keeping their hands off each other. "We will be right back," Ruby announced standing up and taking Robin by the hand, "smoke break," she added to Emma questioning stare.

By the time Emma commented that Ruby didn't smoke they had already disappeared into the dark crowd.

"Robin doesn't smoke either," Killian added finishing his beer and signaling to the bartender that he needed another.

They sat in a somewhat awkward silence for a few moments before Emma piped up, "They act like a couple of love-sick teenagers."

Killian laughed at this comment. Killian had known Robin for over ten years now and he had always been like this. Robin loved, well love when it came down to it. He had never gone more than a few weeks without having a girlfriend since he had met him.

"Robin has always been like this," He told her voicing his thoughts.

"Same with Ruby," Emma said shaking her head.

"Match made in heaven then," Killian responded.

"Or hell, just depends on how you look at it," Emma said. Killian let out a bark of laughter to this, "Aye I guess you are right."

Emma and Killian continued to talk for a while longer getting to know each other. He noted to himself how much more approachable she became after a drink, instead of giving him dirty looks every time he flirted with her, she laughed them off and told him he was being ridiculous. He had learned that she worked for a catering company on the weekends and during the mornings waitressed alongside Ruby and that her surname was Swan other than that she was a total mystery to him.

Killian looked down at his watch and noted that 30 minutes had gone by since Robin and Ruby had left the bar for what they had called a "smoke break." Killian was positive that by now they were both back at Robin's apartment getting into God knows what.

"Oh I am almost positive that they left," Emma said out of the blue, she had evidently noticed him staring at his watch.

"Well that's great," Killian said, "Robin was my ride." This wouldn't have been the first time that Robin had ditched him to be with some girl, and he was certain that it wouldn't be the last.

Emma suddenly stood up and threw a twenty dollar bill on the counter, "Well come on," she said to Killian. This had taken him by surprise.

"Come on where?"

"Well I'm not going to let you walk, it's the middle of January and it's snowing," she told him as pulled on her red coat and matching gloves.

"Lead the way Swan," Killian said as he threw some cash on the counter and followed her out into the cold, snowy night.

 _Author's Note_

 _I will be on vacation for the next week (to Boston of all places), so look for the next chapter next Sunday! Thanks for reading!_


	4. Chapter 4: I Think We're Alone Now

Chapter 4 I Think We're Alone Now

Killian sat in Emma's car rubbing his hands together trying to warm himself up.

"So where am I taking you," Emma questioned as she turned the heat on.

Killian didn't respond right away, he was enjoying his time with her and didn't want it to end just yet. "Um…over on Park," he said.

"Okay," she responded as she fussed with the dials until she found what she was looking for. Smiling she said, "I love this song."

Killian checked his phone just for something to do with his hands. It was strange, Killian thought, he was never nervous around women. Never. However, Emma was different. As he listened to her softly singing along to the Elvis song that was playing on the radio, he thought that she was a good kind of different. He wouldn't admit it to himself, but he hadn't felt this way since Milah. Sure, there had been girls between Milah's passing and when he met Emma, but they never meant anything beyond a cure for his loneliness. "So, uh do you fancy going out for coffee or something?" He asked not daring to look at her reaction.

Emma glanced down at the clock, "Make it a hot chocolate and I'm game."

This made Killian's heart leap. Emma on the other hand looked completely unfazed as she turned her attention back towards the road.

Killian and Emma sat across from each other in an empty booth near the door reading over the menu. The diner they chose was nearly empty besides an old man sitting alone at the bar eating a slice of pie.

A red-headed waitress whose name tag read Betty approached them, "What will you have?"

Killian spoke first, "Just a black coffee."

"A hot chocolate with cinnamon and a piece of apple pie with ice cream," Emma said looking back towards the menu as she ordered.

"Sweet tooth," Killian said to her smirking.

Emma smiled, "Just a bit."

A few moments later, Betty the red-headed waitress brought their drinks, Emma's including a large dollop of whipped cream with cinnamon sprinkled on top. There was a few moments of awkward silence as they sipped their drinks. "So what did you do before working with Ruby?" Killian asked at the same time Emma asked "So you're an EMT?"

They both shared an awkward laugh. "You go first," Killian told her as Betty brought Emma her slice of apple pie to the table.

"So an EMT," Emma said simply.

"Yeah," Killian started, "I've been doing that for around four years now ever since…" he trailed off lamely not wanting to bring up Milah. "Before that I was in the navy," he told her trying to breeze through the awkwardness of his last sentence. "What did you do before coming here?" Killian asked as he drained the last bits of his coffee, changing the subject from his life to hers.

Killian noticed that Emma shifted uncomfortably in her seat before answering, "I used to be a chef. I would still love to have my own restaurant one day," She seem slightly embarrassed that she let the last bit slip out.

"You used to be a chef?" Killian questioned, "Maybe you can cook for me one day."

"Yeah maybe," Emma responded avoiding his eyes.

"Why aren't you still a chef?"

"It's a long story," Emma said with the kind of finality in her voice that indicated that this conversation was over. Killian noted the coolness in her voice. They sat in silence again until Betty came and took their plates and left the check, Killian hastily shoved a twenty dollar bill into her hands before Emma even had the opportunity to open her purse.

"You didn't have to do that," she told him her cheeks going slightly pink.

"I wanted to," Kilian responded.

* * *

Emma dropped Killian off after a silent car ride and a lame "See you around" before he got out of the car.

She was in a weird mood as she drove towards her apartment. She didn't like strange guys coming into her life and trying to ask questions. Her past was none of his concern. She never even fully told her friends the entire story of Neal, and her old career, and she definitely never mentioned the baby. She didn't want his judgement and she definitely didn't want his sympathy.

As she switched on the light of her kitchen she sighed at the dirty dishes still in the sink and the unpaid bills that littered the counter top. She had enough going on in her life right now without the unwanted addition of Killian Jones. He seemed interested in her, and that absolutely terrified her. She was fine being alone, she told herself, she liked it even. She didn't need some sweet talker, playboy coming into her life and completely upending it. Emma vowed to herself that tonight was the last time she would see Killian Jones.

She heard a soft mewing at her feet and saw her black cat, Milo. She reached down and scooped him into her arms, as she pet his head she said, "You are the only guy I need in my life." He mewed and wriggled around until she put him back down again.

She made herself a cup of tea and snuggled under a blanket on the couch with book in hand. This was what she wanted to do all day.

It was just after midnight when her phone rang, putting her book down she looked at her phone, Mary Margaret's name and smiling face showed up.

"Hello," Emma said to her friend.

"Emma, hi," came the bubbly voice of Mary Margaret.

"Hi," Emma said, "It's midnight Mary Margaret, what do you need?"

"Can't I just call and chat to my best friend," she responded innocently.

Emma laughed, "With you, no."

"Okay fine," Mary Margaret started, "It's just that I heard you went on a date. So naturally, as your best friend, I think I deserve to know all the details."

"First of all I didn't go on a date, Ruby did. Also it's midnight you lunatic, bother me with this nonsense in the morning" Emma responded already getting irritated with this conversation.

"That's not what I heard," she retorted.

"And what did you hear?"

"Well Robin told David who told me that you went out for coffee with Killian Jones," she said quickly, "which makes me so happy because Killian is so sweet and I think you two would be such a great fit," she gushed.

Emma rolled her eyes so hard that she was shocked Mary Margaret couldn't hear it through the phone. "Whoa, slow down," Emma said, "I didn't go on a date with Killian, we went for coffee after Ruby and Robin ditched us. So hold off on the wedding planning. And how do you know Killian?"

"Through David," Mary Margaret responded as if it was the most obvious answer.

"And do you guys have nothing better to do than discussing my love life, which is nonexistent because we only went out for coffee and it won't be happening again," Emma said bluntly, not caring about her friends reaction. Ruby and Mary Margaret cared way too much about her love life. It was exhausting.

"Oh," Mary Margaret said in a letdown voice.

"Oh is right," Emma said, "Good night Mary Margaret," she added hanging up the phone before even hearing Mary Margaret's "but."

As Emma went to bed that night, Killian Jones was the farthest thing from her mind.

The same couldn't be same for Killian, because Emma Swan was the only thing on his mind that night.


	5. Chapter 5: Wuv, Twue Wuv

Chapter 5: Wuv, Twue Wuv

Emma couldn't remember the last time that she had such a terrible day at work. She was nearly an hour late for work, dropped the pot of coffee on the floor which shattered into a million tiny pieces and, and put her entire elbow into the pumpkin pie on accident. To put it lightly she was in a horrible mood when closing time rolled around.

And to top it all off she had to listen to Ruby gush over Robin for the past six hours. When she began to tell Emma the story of her and Robins date the previous night for the fifteenth time Emma snapped.

"I get it Ruby, he's great. Would you please, for the love of God shut up about him," Emma snapped at her. Ruby didn't say anything in response but had a hurt look on her face.

Emma felt terrible as soon as the words left her mouth, "Ruby," she said.

"Its fine," Ruby said in a hurt voice.

"It's not," Emma said looking at her friend, "I'm sorry." Ruby didn't say anything for a good twenty minutes before saying out of nowhere as she and Emma wiped down the tables, "You know you could at least pretend to be happy for me."

Emma stopped what she was doing and stood up straight, "I am happy for you."

Ruby scoffed, "Doesn't seem like it."

"Well I am," Emma said to her.

Ruby resumed wiping the bar with more effort than was necessary. She stopped again, "It's just that you never seem to have an interest in my life."

"That's not true," Emma said stopping what she was doing once again.

"It is. Mary Margaret cares, you can't even be bothered to ask me about Robin," Ruby said throwing the rag she was cleaning with into the sink behind the bar.

Emma was now annoyed, "Sorry that your month long relationship isn't the most pressing concern in my life."

At these words Ruby went from feeling hurt to feeling mad, "I forgot that if it doesn't concern you then it must not be important. You are so selfish," at this point Ruby was shoving things into her purse, "I don't even know why I bother, you don't care about anyone but yourself. I'm leaving, lock up behind you." And with that Ruby left the diner slamming the door behind her so hard that closed sign bounced against the door.

As Emma watched Ruby get into her car through the window she felt like the worst person ever. This was the first time she and Ruby had an actually fight, and it didn't feel good. Maybe Ruby was right, maybe she was selfish.

As Emma made her way home she couldn't shake the feeling that she had in the pit of her stomach. She didn't like fighting with her friends, she should have just shut and listened to Ruby. Was it really so terrible that Ruby was happy and wanted to talk about Robin. Emma felt guilty.

 _Later that night_

Emma sat on the couch watching Princess Bride because it was always a pick me up when she was feeling down. Emma was the farthest away from a hopeless romantic as one could possibly be but she had a soft spot for watching Westley and Buttercup fall in love. However, no matter how much she loved the movie was watching, she couldn't shake the guilt she was feeling. She had tried to call Ruby three times with no answer. She wanted nothing more than to apologize for how she acted earlier that day. Like a jerk. Ruby, who had always had Emma's back no matter what didn't deserve that.

She sat there feeling sorry for herself as the end credits rolled when her stomach suddenly rumbled and she realized that she hadn't ate anything since the banana muffin she hastily consumed while driving to work that morning. She went into the kitchen and opened the fridge and was greeted with complete emptiness staring back at her. "Well time to go shopping, I guess," Emma said out loud to herself.

As she walked back towards her car with shopping bags that contained the ingredients to make roast and potatoes, as well as two packages of Oreos she noticed that the roads were already completely covered with a thick layer of now.

She turned her car on and sat waiting for it to heat up while singing along to an 80's Madonna song that was on the radio. The roads were way worse than she had anticipated and her small, yellow Beetles was slipping all over place. She fishtailed twice turning onto roads as she made her way home. She really should have listened when David told her to put on snow tires. Less than five minutes from her apartment her phone started ringing, she dug blindly through her bag knocking it off the passenger seat.

"Great," she muttered trying to reach for her bag while keeping her eyes on the road. "Gotcha," she exclaimed triumphantly as she felt the leather straps to her bag in her hands. She took her eyes off the road just long enough to miss the patch of ice she had just driven over. Her hands let go of the purse in an instant as she lost control of her car and it went spinning off the side of road. Emma let out a piercing scream as the front of her car pummeled into a tree. The impact was so hard that Emma felt that she might break into pieces. Her head smashed against the steering wheel as a mixture of glass and cold air pelted her neck and arms. With blurred vison, she brought a shaking hand up to her head and nearly passed out when she felt the warm, gooey liquid that she knew must be blood on her fingers.

The last thing that she could remember before everything went black was the strong smell of gasoline that made her nostrils burn and the sound of someone screaming her name off in the distance.


	6. Chapter 6: Broken Revisited

Ch. 6 Broken Revisited

Killian woke up ten minutes before his alarm was supposed to go off. This was a rare occurrence for him considering it usually took him hitting the snooze button a good five time before actually opening his eyes and pulling himself from bed. This meant he would actually have time to cook breakfast and make a cup of coffee, and when he said cook breakfast he meant usually eating a bowl of captain crunch.

It was a bitter cold day and the snow was already blowing around making it difficult to see as Killian got in his truck with coffee in hand. Even though he wasn't looking forward to his long 12 hour shift ahead of him, he was in a good mood as he pulled out of his driveway.

As he headed towards the station, Tears for Fears came on the radio. Today will be a good day he thought to himself. 80s music was Killian's guilty pleasure, and hearing his favorite song before work was a sure sign of a great day to come.

He got to work the same time that Robin was pulling up. "Hey Rob," Killian called waving from across the parking lot. Robin waved back as he caught up with Killian.

Robin was holding a hilariously sized red bull as he yawned while holding the door for Killian. "Long night?" Killian questioned with a smirk.

"Ruby is insane," Robin said with a laugh.

"You might just have to marry that one," Killian joked. When Robin's face turned serious, Killian responded with "Just a joke."

"Not to me," Robin said as he dug into his jacket pocket and pulled out a small, velvet box.

"You're fucking with me," Killian said in disbelief.

Robin shook his head and laughed, "Not at all."

"But it's only been what, like a month?" Killian questioned incredulously. He knew Robin to be a hopeless romantic, but this was just ridiculous.

"I know, I know," Robin said putting the ring box back into his pocket, "But Ruby is different. It's just right with her."

"Well then congrats mate," Killian said hugging his best friend. Robin laughed, "I'm going to do it at Liam's big St. Patrick's Day party next month. That's Ruby's birthday."

"Blimey," Killian said, "Another one bites the dust," he added with a laugh. Even though he was laughing off the proposal, deep down it struck a chord with him and Liam's words echoed through his head, "This could be you next you know."

"Have you talked to Emma anymore," Robin asked Killian as they entered into the station.

"Not since that night a few weeks ago, I never got her number," Killian admitted.

"I'm sure I can persuade Ruby to bring her along to a hockey game again," Robin said.

Killian shrugged his shoulders, "Doesn't matter, there are plenty of fish in the sea." He wasn't exactly sure why he was brushing it off, probably because it was easier than admitting that girl he hung out with a total of two times had been on his mind constantly the past three weeks.

"Sure," Robin said giving him a look, but letting the subject go.

The rest of Killian's day was pretty uneventful besides a fender bender where one of the vehicles occupants was complaining about his neck and forced Killian and Robin to bring him to the hospital even though there was clearly nothing wrong with him. Other than that, the day consisted of bringing elderly patients to and from the hospital, and flirting with Becca who worked the admissions desk in the emergency room where he often frequented.

At eight, Killian and Robin both clocked out and made their way out of the building. "Claire and Liam are making dinner tonight, they invited you as well," Killian told Robin as they stood between the two cars, Robin beginning to clean the snow from his windshield.

Robin shook his head no, "I've got plans with Ruby, tell Claire I'll be there next week."

"She'll hold you to that," Killian laughed as like Robin he began clearing the snow from his car.

"Don't I know it, your brother really married a feisty one. See you later," Robin laughed in turn. Killian watched and continued to clean the snow from his car as Robin got into his car and sped from the parking lot.

The snow was falling heavily now, and by the time Killian climbed into his truck his hair and boots were damp from the snow.

Killian put on some music before making the drive to his brother and sister-in-law's house for dinner.

The twenty minute drive to Liam and Claire's was taking much longer than usual, possibly due to the dark, snowy conditions and other drivers being more cautious than usual. Even for Killian, the dark sky and flurry of white snow made it nearly impossible to see very far in front of his truck, and he was used to driving in all types of weather. Killian was singing along with the Queen song on the radio, driving carefully, when he saw something that made his heart stop. A small car apparently hit a patch of ice and the driver lost control. He watched with bated breath as the car spun off the road, missing the guard rail by inches and plowing into a tree. Time seemed to stand still for a moment, as the event unfolded in front of Killian's eyes.

Without a second thought Killian pulled his truck over to the side of the road and rushed across the snowy road, slipping along the way, trying to get to the driver as quickly as possible. He pulled out his phone to call 911, when something made his heart plummet to the bottom of his gut. He saw that this car was in fact a small, yellow Beetle. Emma's small, yellow Beetle.

He picked up his pace and ran across the street and down to the mangled car yelling Emma at the top of his lungs. He saw that the front of the car was crushed in and went around to the driver's side of the car. At this point the dispatcher was now on the phone asking what the emergency was.

"Car crash, right off Maple and Main, driver isn't moving" Killian yelled into the phone as he saw Emma's blonde hair fanned out and her face against the steering wheel.

"Emma," he yelled pulling open the door, "Emma can you hear me?" Killian knew better than to move her, not knowing if she had any spinal injury.

Killian put his hand on her neck, checking for a pulse, he gave a sigh of relief when he felt a faint pulse. "She has a pulse," Killian said into his phone, "Great, emergency services are on the way," the dispatcher said.

Emma stirred slightly, "Emma," Killian said, "Help is on the way hang in there," he found her hand and gave it a soft squeeze. While waiting for help, he managed to brush the hair away from her face and saw the huge gash on her head that was bleeding profusely. He took of his jacket, ignoring the blistery, cold air and used the sleeve to try and stop the bleeding.

Minutes later, an ambulance and police car pulled up. Killian saw the familiar figures of his co-workers Will and Belle approach.

"Killian," Belle called out, "We didn't know you called it in."

"I witnessed it," Killian chocked out. He was used to seeing horrific car accidents, it was part of his everyday life, but seeing it happen to someone that you knew was a whole different ball game.

Killian watched in stunned silence as they pulled her from the car, placed her on a stretcher and loaded her into the ambulance. Making a quick decision, Killian hopped into the ambulance behind them. "I know her," Killian said to Will's questioning eyes.

"No problem," he said taking Emma's pulse and making quick work at cleaning her up.

As they wheeled her into the ER, Killian held back deciding that he should call Robin.

After a few rings, a haughty sound Robin answered, "You are interrupting."

"Robin, thank God you answered, put Ruby on," Killian said.

"Wait, what? Why do you need to speak to her?" Robin questioned sounding both annoyed and confused.

"It's an emergency, Emma was in a car accident," Killian explained. He could her Robin saying to Ruby that Emma was in an accident.

"Oh my God, what happened?" Ruby questioned sounding on the verge of tears.

"Emma was in a car accident, I didn't know how to contact her family," Killian told her as she sounded more and more hysterical.

"She doesn't have any family," Ruby said, "We are coming there right now, where are you?"

"Mass General," Killian answered. Ruby didn't bothering replying and hung up instead.

"Aye Jones," he heard Will yell as he exited through the doors, "Did you call her family?"

"Um, yes," Killian told him not sure how to answer that question.

"Great," Will said, "Well she has a nasty cut on her head, probably a concussion and we think a few broken ribs, but other than that she's fine."

Killian let out a breath that he didn't realize he had been holding in, "That's wonderful," he said collapsing onto the bench closest to him. Today had not ended up being the great day that Killian had predicted earlier. He was just happy that Emma was going to be okay.


	7. Chapter 7: Funny the Way It Is

Chapter 7 Funny the Way It Is

Emma woke up to the sound of someone snoring from across the room and the curled up form of Mary Margaret in the chair next to Emma's bed reading a book. She attempted to sit up in bed and was stopped by the shooting pains in her ribs. The hiss of pain that escaped Emma's lips was enough to gain Mary Margaret's attention.

"You're finally awake," Mary Margaret said smiling and scooting her chair closer to Emma. Although she was smiling, she looked deeply concerned. "How are you feeling?"

"Not great," Emma replied, trying to find a comfortable position in the hospital bed. "What time is it?" Emma questioned noticing the newly lightening sky through the small window.

Mary Margaret glanced down at her watch, "Around 7:30, you've been out for a while." Emma nodded silently. "Ruby left a few hours ago to get some sleep, and this one over here," Mary Margaret said motioning to the sleeping form of Killian across the room, "refused to leave," she continued saying.

Emma looked over and saw Killian sleeping in an uncomfortable looking, high backed chair sleeping with his head in his hand. "It's kinda cute," Mary Margaret offered, "I think he likes you." Emma didn't say anything to this and instead changed the subject, "I still need to apologize to Ruby. And you didn't have to come so early."

"I know, but I wanted to. Plus I wouldn't worry about Ruby," Mary Margaret stoop up from the chair and was stretching her arms above her head and yawned, "So you and Killian huh?"

"There is nothing going on between us," Emma said rolling her eyes.

"Doesn't look that way, considering he slept here all night," Mary Margaret said.

"He was just making sure I was okay," Emma retorted.

"And when he found out you were, he still stayed." Emma didn't have a response to this. Mary Margaret looked delighted, "Well he likes you at least."

"I don't know," Emma said. She refused to talk about things involving Killian to Mary Margaret who would get her hopes up. She always went on and on about how Emma needed to find someone like David and settle down.

Both Emma and Mary Margaret were interrupted by a knock on the door. "Ms. Swan," the doctor announced before walking into the room.

"Dr. James," Mary Margaret said shaking his hand.

"Hello," he said pleasantly grabbing Emma's records. "Well Ms. Swan, it looks like we can discharge you today but take it easy for the next week, we'll send you home with pain meds for nausea and pain but other than that you are good to go," he said smiling and closing her file.

"Great, thank you," Mary Margaret told the doctor as he left the room. "I'm going to call David and get some coffee, I'll be back soon," she told her grabbing her bag from the floor.

"Get me some," Emma said.

"No coffee, you have a concussion," Mary Margaret said smiling as she left the room. Emma watched her leave the room and shifted in the bed again trying to get comfortable. This task proved fruitless however because every breath that she took caused a sharp pain in her chest. It had been a long night with Emma fading in and out of sleep due to the pain medicine she was receiving to cope with her broken ribs and the nine stitches on her forehead. She looked over at Killian while thinking about what Mary Margaret had said. He had not only found her in the wreck and saved her, but he had stayed with her the entire night. But the fact that he possibly cared about her really terrified her. Why would he care about her? He didn't know her, not really at least.

"You shouldn't be thinking that hard, you have a concussion," came a voice from the corner shaking her from her solitary thoughts. Emma looked up and was met with the sparkling blue eyes and mischievous smile of Killian Jones.

"Funny," Emma replied sarcastically ignoring the butterflies in her stomach. Emma watched him as he stood up, stretching and rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. She had to admit he was attractive, especially in the early morning with messy hair and a hint of stubble on his face.

"How do you feel?" he asked taking the chair closest to her bed that was recently evacuated by Mary Margaret.

"I'll be fine," Emma said avoiding his gaze.

"Yes, you will."

Emma smiled, "Thank you, by the way. You kind of saved me."

He smiled in return, "Anytime Swan, anytime."

"And thanks for staying too, I appreciate it," Emma told him. His face lit up in return and this time it was impossible to ignore the butterflies in her stomach. Their eyes locked and Emma feeling embarrassed, turned her attention away.

"So," he said coughing before continuing, "Well when you are feeling better, well obviously, I was wondering if you want to get dinner with me," he said fumbling over his words. Emma had to admit, watching him stumble over words and look nervous was kind of endearing.

Emma let out a laugh. Killian looked up, "Are you laughing at me?" he asked raising an eyebrow.

"Are you asking me out while I'm in this hospital bed?" She responded still laughing, "Ow," she moaned clutching her sides, laughing hurt.

"That's what you get for laughing at me," Killian said, "So what do you say?"

Emma smiled, "Yes," she said simply.

"Great," he said clapping his hands together and standing up, "So would you think less of me if I went home for a bit to freshen up?"

Emma shook her head, "Seriously Killian, you have done more than enough. I really do appreciate it,"

"Not a problem at all, love." Emma's heart did a little jump at her calling her love. She watched as he left and couldn't get rid of the smile on her face.

She couldn't believe that Killian asked her on a date, and she was even more shocked that she had said yes. Even though she felt happy, she couldn't shake the feeling that it was a mistake, for years she had told herself that she didn't need a man and now she was being conned into a date by a guy with a cute smile and attractive accent.

"Knock, knock," she heard Mary Margaret say, "Look who I found," she said indicated to Ruby who was lingering behind her. Ruby gave a small wave.

"Hey Ruby," Emma said moments before Ruby burst into tears and went running towards Emma's bed.

"Oh Emma, I am so sorry. I was acting like a jerk. And when I heard you were in the hospital I blamed myself," she rambled on sitting on the edge of Emma's bed and holding Emma's hand in hers.

"Ruby, I am the one who should be sorry. I do care about you and Robin's relationship. And of course I'm thrilled that you are so in love and happy," Emma said feeling tears well up in her eyes and threatening to spill over.

"Oh Emma," Ruby said going in for a hug.

"Ow, ribs Ruby, watch my ribs," Emma said. Ruby jumped back immediately, "I'm sorry."

"Okay. Great," Mary Margaret said loudly, "Everyone is happy again."

"Oh shut it," Ruby said to Mary Margaret who smirked in return.

"Where's Killian?" Mary Margaret asked. This was a subject that Emma was now desperate to avoid.

"He left."

"Left?" she questioned.

"Yes, he left Mary Margaret. He left after he asked me out," Emma added the last part and felt her face turn bright red. She knew she had to tell them. They would have weaseled it out her anyways.

Ruby and Mary Margaret both erupted into excited squeals after hearing this news. "Shh," Emma said to them laughing. Her best friends were a little over the top at times.

"That's so exciting," Ruby exclaimed.

"He is just perfect for you," Mary Margaret said with matched enthusiasm.

"Yeah, yeah," Emma muttered while a yawn hit her.

"Why don't we go find out when they are discharging you and you get some rest," Mary Margaret said indicating for her and Ruby to both leave.

Emma rested her head against the pillow and closed her eyes, thinking about Killian, and the events of the past 24 hours as sleep overtook her.


	8. Chapter 8: Pretty in Pink, part one

Chapter 8: Pretty in Pink, part one

For the next two weeks Emma's feelings about going on a date with Killian changed almost daily. She went as far as tying of a lame excuse in a text message, but by the end of typing it had changed her mind once again. She wasn't exactly sure why she felt so panicked over the prospect of this one simple date. Probably because deep down she knew that it wasn't just one simple date. One date could lead to two which could lead to a relationship. And what if it was a total disaster, and even worse what if it wasn't a total disaster. What if he fell in love? What if she did and he didn't reciprocate the feelings? These thoughts plagued Emma until the day of the date.

The few hours preceding the date had passed in a whirlwind of makeup, dresses, and hairspray. By the end of it Emma found herself wearing a ballerina pink dress that she thought made her look like a housewife from the 50's, a high pony tail, more makeup on her face than she could ever remember wearing, and Ruby and Mary Margaret high fiving over what they were calling their "masterpiece." They had somehow, as if by magic, covered up the slight scar that now adorned her forehead thanks to the accident.

Emma looked in the mirror and frowned at the bright pink lipstick that was on her lips. It was too much, before Ruby could stop her she grabbed a tissue and began wiping it off.

"Emma no!" Ruby protested but it was too late.

"It's too much Ruby," Emma responded as she put plain Chap Stick on her lips, "I would like to look like myself."

"You do look like yourself," Ruby said, "just a very girly version of yourself."

Mary Margaret joined in the conversation, "You look great Emma."

Emma smiled at her friends, "Thanks guys. I'm hopeless at this girly stuff."

They both laughed. "We know," Ruby said with a smile on her face.

"What do you think Killian will think?" Emma asked her friends finally letting her insecurities be voiced.

"He will love it," Ruby said, "and if he doesn't you can always punch him. We know you have a killer left hook."

Emma threw the tissue she was holding at her friend, "That was one time," she exclaimed, "plus he tried to stick his hands up my shirt!" Mary Margaret and Ruby just laughed.

She thought back to the moment Ruby was referring to and laughed along with them. It had been one of the more catastrophic dates she had ever been on. It was a guy Ruby had set her up on a blind date with last summer, he had taken her to a really shady bar then tried to grope her leading to him leaving with a black eye and her with an aching fist.

"You really could write a book about your dating mishaps," Mary Margaret said.

"Yeah," Ruby chimed in, "you could call it A Series of Unfortunate Events." This made both Ruby and Mary Margaret howl with laughter.

"I forgot that you two were comedians," Emma said rolling her eyes, "plus I think that name is already taken, thanks."

"Well," Ruby began, "we should probably go."

Mary Margaret pulled her into a tight hug, "Have fun. Call me as soon as you get home."

"I will," Emma said reassuringly.

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do," Ruby joked.

Emma smiled and began herding them out the door, "Trust me I won't, now go."

One they left and Emma found herself quite alone the feeling of regret and panic returned. It was too late now, she told herself, no turning back.

* * *

Killian was nervous. Actually more than nervous, he was downright terrified. Other than Milah, he had never felt this way about another woman before. On one hand he already cared for Emma immensely, and on the other hand he was terrified about what these feelings meant. Did caring about Emma mean he was over Milah? And being over Milah really set in stone the fact that she was gone and that she was never coming back to him. It was almost too much to handle.

He had thought about canceling the date more than once over the course of the past two weeks since he had seen Emma. He was only stopped due to words Liam had been putting into his head more and more frequently, that Milah would have wanted him to be happy. And Emma definitely made him happy.

He threw on his black leather jacket, before giving one last glance in the mirror. His facial hair had grown into somewhat of a beard over these past few weeks, and he actually preferred it that way. Overall he thought that he looked pretty handsome, he hoped that Emma would agree.

He could remember the last time he felt this way before a date. He usually only concerned himself with ways that the date would end up back in his bedroom, and now he was concerned with whether or not Emma would enjoy herself and not regret the whole thing.

A short twenty minutes later Killian found himself standing outside of Emma's apartment door with a shiny, brass number 3 on it that seemed to be the cleanest thing in the shabby looking hallway. It took him a few moments to build up the courage to knock.

He took a deep breath and rapped on the door three times, when Emma opened the door he felt all of the breath leave his body. She looked incredible, like something out of a dream.

Before even saying a hello he muttered, "You look stunning, Emma."

Emma smiled and looked him up and down, "You look…"

He smirked when she couldn't find the words to say, "I know."

This made Emma laugh, "Don't be cocky," she held the door open a little wider and motioned for him to come in. "I just have to grab my purse," she said disappearing into the apartment and down the little hall.

He stepped in and closed the door behind him and took in his surroundings. While the outside had looked rather old and shabby the inside of Emma's living room could only be considered one thing, comfortable. The living room was decorated in warm shades of red, pinks, and yellows, and the white, plush looking couch was filled with multicolored pillows and a soft throw. Two large book shelved lined the walls and looked like they were about to burst. He ran his finger over the spine of some of the books, it contained many classics like Robinson Crusoe and Frankenstein and more cookbooks than he had ever seen.

Emma emerged from what he was assumed was a bedroom a few minutes later, she had slipped on a black pea coat and olive green colored mittens. "Well let's go," she said in a slightly forced cheerful voice.

"After you," Killian said opening the door for her and following her out into the dark and chilly night.

Killian had planned on taking her to a small, Italian restaurant called De Luca's, which he and his brother Liam loved to frequent. It was where Liam had taken Claire on their first date, and where he had proposed to her two years later. He hoped that it might give him a little luck to bring her there.

Over the past few years, he and Liam had become close with the owners Carlo and Maria and their two sons Stefano and Marco, who sometimes played hockey with Killian and his friends. They had become something of a second family to him.

They did him a favor tonight and had cleared the restaurant so Killian and Emma would have the place to themselves and a better opportunity to get to know one another. He was very hopeful with what the evening would entail.

 _Author's note: Part two of this will be up tomorrow evening! Thanks so much for reading!_


	9. Chapter 9: Pretty in Pink, part two

Chapter 9: Pretty in Pink, part two

As they sat down at their table, Emma had to admit that she was impressed. The restaurant was completely empty and the table they were sitting at was lit up with small tea lights and a single red rose was in a glass vase. It was like something out of a dream.

Killian had introduced her to the owners Carlo and Maria De Luca before they sat down. It was adorable the way Maria fussed over Killian.

"They are cute," Emma remarked, "How long have you been coming here?"

"Well Liam started coming here years ago, it was the first place he took Claire on a date, and where he proposed to her," Killian explained, "It's become important in our lives."

"That's sweet."

As Carlo brought out overflowing plates of gnocchi and chicken parmigiana, Emma couldn't help but smile homemade Italian food was her weakness. Being a former chef she could really appreciate all the love that went into every dish.

Emma let out a small moan as she took a bite, "This is honestly amazing."

Killian smiled at her, "Maria will be thrilled to hear that."

"They seem to be very fond of you," Emma remarked.

"They are like a second family to me," Killian said simply.

"That must make your parents jealous," Emma said with a laugh. She immediately noticed his face fall and his demeanor change.

"Aye, I'm sure they would be if they are still around," He said. He didn't sound angry or sad, just slightly hollow as he said those words. Emma felt terrible.

Emma reached across the table and gave his hand a gentle squeeze. "I'm sorry I didn't know," she told him.

He gave her a sad smile, "It's alright, love. It was a long time ago." Her heart leaped a little at the term of endearment, just as it had when she was in the hospital.

"We are in the same boat," she said thoughtfully, "I never knew my parents."

"I know," he said, "Ruby told me the day of your accident," he explained further at the puzzled look on her face.

"Right," Emma said, "So not to change the subject or anything but I'll be very upset if you don't give me a bite of your dinner."

This made Killian laugh and he shoved his plate towards her, "have at it."

"This is so good."

Killian laughed again, "I'm happy you are enjoying it."

After they finished their meal, Maria brought out a large slice of tiramisu for them to share.

"How did you know food was the way to win me over?" Emma questioned as she took a bite of the cake in front of her.

"Well I know that you said you used to cook so I thought you would enjoy this."

She nodded in agreement and smiled again. She was having such a wonderful night with him that she forgot to worry and fret about what Killian in her life would mean.

* * *

Killian watched Emma smile as she took another sip of her wine. She was so beautiful, without thinking he reached across the table and weaved his fingers into hers, he was thrilled when she smiled and didn't pull away.

"We should do this again," she said.

"I agree," he said happily.

As they drove back towards Emma's apartment, Killian was thinking to himself that this may have been the best date he had ever been on.

"So I realized that I never property thanked you for staying with me after my accident," Emma said intently starring out the window.

"You are very welcome," Killian said, "I've been meaning to ask about your car."

"Totaled," she said simply, "After my period of mourning, I should probably look for something new."

"Mourning?" he questioned with a laugh.

"Hey," she exclaimed in mock offense," I loved that car."

He smiled at her but didn't say anything. He pulled up in front of her apartment and got out of the car, "I'll walk you up."

He found himself standing outside her apartment in the dingy hallway as they continued talking.

"So next week my brother is throwing a huge St. Patrick's Day party, would you like to come with me?" he questioned.

"I wouldn't miss it," she said.

After this they found themselves in a slight awkward silence, and the overwhelming feeling of wanting to kiss Emma hit Killian like a ton of bricks.

He made the decision to go for it and leaned it the exact same moment that Emma began rummaging for her keys in her purse. For some reason this threw him off and he lost his nerve. He instead looked down at his feet.

She looked up at him, "Well night then." He didn't miss the hint of disappointment in her voice.

"Good night, Emma," Killian said as she opened her door. Without another word he turned and walked away cursing himself for not kissing her.

When was the last time he had a date like that? He honestly couldn't remember. He regretted not kissing her because she completely opened up to him and the edge of disappointment in her voice when saying bye didn't go unnoticed.

He realized what a huge mistake he made before he even made it to his car.

* * *

For a split second Emma thought that he leaned in as if to kiss her when she was looking for her keys. However after that moment passed she thought that maybe it was just wishful thinking.

"Well night then," Emma said sure that a kiss wasn't in the cards tonight. She was slightly confused she thought that the night had went well.

"Good night, Emma," Killian said to her and turned to walk away. Emma remained in her door way watching him go, feeling not only disappointed but confused as well.

Maybe he didn't enjoy the date. Or maybe she said something wrong. Usually Emma was the kind of girl who would have brushed this off but she just couldn't this time.

Emma made her way into the kitchen and took off her heels leaving them in the middle of the floor and took out her ponytail, letting her hair fall in loose waves around her shoulders.

As she set the kettle on the stove and turned on the burner she head a knock at the door.

She was surprised to find Killian standing there, his cheeks slightly red, probably from the cold Emma thought.

"Hey," Emma said in a questioning tone, "did you forget something?"

"Yes," he said simply. Before Emma knew what was happening Killian had closed the gap between them and had pressed his lips against hers.

Emma responded passionately, deepening the kiss and drawing him closer to her. She thought the he tasted like a mix of mint and bourbon as they continued to kiss in the doorway of her apartment.

She broke the kiss moments later when she heard the whistle of the kettle going off in the kitchen. "I should probably get that," she said.

"Aye, you probably should," he said, his lips were pinker now and took everything in Emma not to pounce on him again.

"I'm making tea if you want to come in," Emma offered.

"I wish I could, but I have to call it a night," Killian said. Emma felt slightly disappointed but in the same sense relived, she didn't know if she would have been able to draw the line at kissing if he came in.

"Call me tomorrow?" Emma questioned, trying to sound as casual as possible.

"Of course, love." Emma watched as he left again, feeling hopeful about a guy for the first time in a long time.


	10. Chapter 10: Kiss Me, I'm Irish

Chapter 10: Kiss me, I'm Irish

For the next week Killian and Emma's opposing schedules prevented them from seeing or speaking to one another other than the few texts shared between them confirming the evening's plans. Emma had been pulling double shifts at the diner to make up for her lost wages and Killian had been working nonstop ensuring that he would have the weekend off for his brother's huge St. Patrick's day party. By the time Saturday rolled around, Emma was really looking forward to attending the party that evening because she would get the chance to spend some time with Killian and would enjoy the chance to unwind after an extremely hectic work week. A small part of her was anxious though, she would be meeting Killian's brother tonight after only one date. It was a huge step, and no matter how hard Killian tried to reassure her that it wasn't a big deal it still felt like it.

By the time 8 o'clock rolled around Emma sat in her apartment waiting for Killian with Guinness cupcakes in hand and every article of green clothing she owned on her body. While the fire she once had for cooking had burned out over the years, baking was something that calmed her nerves and made her happy. And she knew, from the few time making them before, that these Guinness cupcakes with Irish cream icing were a hit. She usually wasn't the type of person who gave more than a spare thought about St. Patrick's Day but it sounded like a pretty big deal in Killian's world. It surprised her how much she wanted to impress Liam, it was slightly out of character for her. Killian didn't realize it but he was really make her come out of her shell with relative ease.

Her phone buzzed from inside her pocket, she read the message from Killian that said "I'm parked out front." Emma pulled on her coat and made her way to his truck that was parked right outside her apartment door.

When she opened the door he smiled at her, "What have you got there?"

"Cupcakes," she responded climbing into the passenger seat, "I didn't want to show up empty handed." For some reason she felt slightly self-conscious.

Killian beamed at her, "You, my dear Swan, are adorable," he teased.

"And don't you forget it," Emma teased.

The remained of the car ride was filled with uneventful small talk about their past weeks.

When they arrived at the party, Emma could hear the music from outside. She suddenly felt overwhelmed. Killian grabbed her hand at that moment and rubbed soothing circles on her palm with his fingers. "They will love you," he reassured her, "plus Ruby and Robin will be here, too."

Emma shot him a tentative smile and nodded. She didn't voice her concerns and thoughts, but this was the first time she had ever met the family of a guy she was dating. Neal had been estranged from his parents, and she never dated another guy long enough to make it to this step.

When they arrived at the party, Emma was greeted with an explosion of kelly green and the smell of beer and whisky. Killian took the cupcakes out of her hand, "I'm going to bring these in the kitchen," he shouted over the loud music, "I'll be right back."

Emma stood in the entry way of Killian's brother's home and took in the scene around her. People were covered head to toe in green, some dancing with drinks in hand and other laughing with friends. She felt slightly overwhelmed, she hadn't been to a house party like this since, well she couldn't actually recall if she had ever been to a house party like this before.

Moments later, Emma saw Killian making his way back towards her with who she recognized as Liam and Claire in tow.

"Emma this is Liam," Killian announced in a loud voice over the music and talking around his, "And Liam this is -,"

Killian was cut off by his brother yelling "Emma" and pulling her into a tight squeeze planting a slopping kiss on her cheek. Emma couldn't help but laugh.

"Liam is clearly drunk," Killian muttered looking embarrassed. Claire, Liam's wife and Killian's sister-in-law, stood behind her husband looking amused and clearly not surprised by his antics. Claire could really only be described in one word, beautiful. She had jet black hair that was cut in a stylish bob and bright green eyes that seemed to sparkle even in the dim, smoky lighting.

"Hi Emma, I'm Claire," she said simply waving and smiling.

"So you are the girl who has stolen the heart of our old Killy here," Liam said loudly while elbowing Killian in the ribs. Killian's face was growing redder with every passing moment.

"Stop harassing them Li," Claire told her husband while rolling her eyes in an amused way.

"Alright, alright," Liam said holding his hands up in surrender. He immediately noticed someone from across the room and called out to them, "Oi Will! Let's do a shot," without saying goodbye to either Killian or Emma he began making his way through the crowded room towards his friend. Claire told them a quick good bye and made her way after her husband.

"My charming brother," Killian muttered, clearly annoyed by his older brothers antics.

"Awe Killy," Emma said in a teasing voice, "Don't be embarrassed," Emma added with a laugh. Killian shot a mock glare at her and pulled her into a side head, pressing a kiss against the top of her hair.

"Well the fact that you aren't running for the hills is a great sign," he said smiling.

"They seem great," Emma told him. And she really meant it, she was concerned about formally meeting Liam and Claire all week and it turned out to be so easy and relaxed. She could picture herself having lots of fun with them in the future.

"Drunk more like it," Killian said with a laugh. He held out his hand to her, "Speaking of which, let's go get you a drink." She grabbed hold of his hand and was pulled in the direction of the kitchen.

* * *

Killian had been more than a little nervous for Emma to meet his family, and was thrilled to see the way that she dealt with the whirlwind that was his older brother.

"What are you having," he asked Emma as they stood in the kitchen. The entire island had been filled with various types of alcohol and mixers. Even though it was shortly after 9 empty beer bottles already littered every open surface in the kitchen.

"Whatever you are having," she replied with a shrug. She kept standing on her tip toes scanning the crowd for a sign or Ruby or Robin. He poured himself a large glass of Rum and coke and made an identical one for her.

By the time he pushed the drink her hand she was waving towards someone in the other room. Ruby and Robin were making their way towards them decked out in green like everyone else. Ruby had of course taken it a step farther and was wearing deep green lipstick and gold glitter all over her face and body. Instead of looking crazy, Killian thought that she actually pulled it off.

"Hey guys," Killian said as they stood in front of them. He shot a wink at Robin that went missed by both Emma and Ruby who were embracing each other like long lost sisters.

Killian noticed that Robin looked a little on edge and refused a drink from Ruby. Killian knew why, because he had heard about it every day for the past week at work. Tonight was the night Robin was going to propose to Ruby. And everything was going to be happening very shortly. They had planned it out that at 10:00 pm when Liam made his usual drunken, rambling, speech thanking everyone for coming. Claire was going to take the mic off of him and call Robin up, at which point he would profess his love in front of everyone and ask Ruby for her hand in marriage.

Killian was honored to be a part of the plan, but in the same sense had mixed feelings about the entire thing. The past few months his life had been surrounded by marriage from Liam's wedding to now Robin and Ruby potentially getting engaged. It made him feel slightly melancholy because he never had the chance to get to this stage with Milah, and on the other hand he was hopeful for his future. This was a surprising thought to him, for years he had sworn off marriage and monogamy, yet as he looked at the beautiful blond on his arm he didn't feel so strongly about that anymore.

Killian glanced down at his watch, and like clockwork Liam had cut the music and grabbed the microphone. Killian watched in embarrassment, like he did everywhere as Liam stumbled through his thank you speech and encouraged the already hammered group to drink more. At the end of his record breaking, fifteen minute speech that had many, including Emma in tears from laughing so hard.

Claire grabbed the microphone off of her husband, "I would also like to thank everyone for coming out, we love having you guys here. This year, our good friend Robin would also like to add something," she said, "here Robin," she finished by thrusting the microphone into Robin's hand and stood on the edge of her crowd clutching her husband's hand and beaming at Robin.

Robin cleared his throat and began to speak while standing in the middle of the floor. "Happy St. Patrick's day," he said into the mic and was greeted with many cheers back, "So if you guys were not aware, I have been dating this amazing girl named Ruby for the past few months," he paused before continuing, "And they have been, without a doubt, the most incredible months of my life."

Killian stole a glance at Ruby who was smiling and already had tears shimmering in her eyes. Emma was clutching onto Killian's hands and watching her friend with great interest.

"Ruby," Robin continued, "I love you. You are the most amazing woman I have ever met." At this point he was now pulling a small box out of his jacket pocket. Killian heard both Emma and Ruby let out an audible gasp. Ruby now had her hands covering her mouth in disbelief.

"I promise that I will love you always," he got down on one knee and stopped speaking into the microphone, "Will you make me the luckiest man alive and marry me?"

Ruby was immediately in his arms screaming yes over and over again and kissing every inch of Robin that she could. The entire room went wild celebrating.

Killian locked eyes with Emma and they shared a sentimental smile. He pulled her into a tight hug and they watched Robin put the ring on Ruby's finger and tried to put everything he felt and hoped for in the future into that hug.

As he fell asleep that night in his brother's guest room with a passed out Emma in his arms, he was thinking that he, not Robin, was the luckiest man alive.


	11. Chapter 11: A Head Full of Dreams

Chapter 11: A Head Full of Dreams

The next few weeks of Emma's life were like something out of a fairy tale. Albeit a fairy tale that included pulling double shifts to make ends meet and two annoying friends but also a Prince Charming as well. Killian had fit himself into her life with such ease, that it felt like he had been around since day one. This scared Emma, because it was the exact kind of thoughts she had when she was with Neal. And to say that relationship ended disastrously would be an underestimate.

It was a Wednesday afternoon which was Emma's usual day off and like always she found herself scrubbing her kitchen completely clean. It wasn't like Emma was a neat freak by any means, but having a clean kitchen was something that followed her out of the culinary world and it made her happy.

She was so caught up with cleaning that she didn't hear someone knocking at her door. Emma jumped so high that she almost knocked the bucket of water on the floor over when she heard someone call her name from the living room. "Emma," she heard Killian calling, "Are you home?"

"In the kitchen," she called back beginning to peal the bright yellow kitchen gloves off.

When he walked in the kitchen his face lit up. "I was knocking for a while," he explained, "then I remembered that you showed me where the spare key was the other day." Emma couldn't help but think how cute he looked today, when she noticed his forest green t-shirt that showed off his muscles.

She on the other hand looked like a train wreck. She had her hair thrown into a messy bun that was perched on top of her head, the t-shirt that she was wearing was so old that it was littered with holes and had a pair of bleach stained black leggings on.

"So what's up?" she asked while throwing the gloves down on the island.

"I was in the neighborhood and knew you had the day off," he said, "so I decided to stop by and see if you wanted to go get ice cream or something."

"Ice cream?"

"Yeah, it's nice out and seems like a good idea," he said simply.

"Alright. Let me change first though," Emma told him.

Killian shot her a smile, "What are you not going to wear that."

Emma gave him a dangerous look, "So funny. Let's see how good you look when I barge in on you unexpected."

"I look beautiful 24/7 love," he offered with a laugh. Emma stuck her tongue out at him before leaving for her bedroom. As she walked down the hall she heard him laugh and call out "so mature Swan."

She emerged minutes later wearing black skinny jeans, a deep red V-neck shirt, and red converse. After washing her face she decided to forgo makeup and left her hair in the messy bun. Emma wasn't usually one to care about her appearance and Killian's presence in her life didn't really change that.

"Let's go," she said before grabbing her purse and heading out the door with Killian trailing behind her.

Killian and Emma ventured down the street heading towards the ice cream shop he had noticed the other day after dropping her off from dinner with Claire and Liam.

She walked slightly ahead of him and he couldn't stop himself from admiring how beautiful she looked. Emma was the kind of woman who could put zero effort into her appearance and still look more stunning than any model.

He felt over the moon when he reached for her hand and she accepted. They continued to walk in a comfortable silence before Emma stopped dead in her tracks and he almost tripped over her.

"What?" he questioned. She stopped in front of an empty storefront that had a sign that said for sale in red block letters. It was a tiny building that was crammed between a tailor's shop and a photographer's business.

"Every time I walk past this place I always think of how great it would be to have a little café here," she said this more to herself than to him. And for one of the very first times Killian realized that she was opening up a small part of herself that she kept hidden to him. She had always shied away from discussing anything from her past career as a chef, simply responding that it was a long story than changing the subject.

"It's silly," she continued, "but owning my own restaurant is something I still dream about." He looked at her and noticed the sad, wistful smile on her face.

He gave her hand a slight squeeze, "One day you will have it." His words seemed to pull her out of her trance. Looking embarrassed she put her head down. Killian wasn't exactly sure what to say to her without pushing the story of her past. Which she was clearly reluctant to give.

"Let's go get that ice cream, okay," she said in a cheerful voice flipping 360 from where her emotions were moments before. He smiled and nodded following her a little farther down the road until they reached their destination.

As they ate their ice cream he wished he would have done more to comfort her before but he didn't want to push. He would give Emma all the little cafes in the world if he could. It was way too early, for both himself and for Emma, to be throwing the L word around. But he could feel himself falling for the beautiful blonde who was sitting in front of him, licking mint chocolate chip ice cream before it ran over the sides of her cone and onto her fingers.

"I can't believe of all the flavors of ice cream in the world, you choose vanilla," she said pulling him out of his own thoughts.

"What is wrong with vanilla?" he asked in a mock offended voice.

Emma scoffed. "It's the most boring flavor," she told him.

Without thinking Killian plunged his vanilla ice cream cone at her and got it on her nose, "How's that for boring?"

Emma sat stunned for a moment then began laughing while dabbing her nose with a napkin. "I can't believe you did that," she exclaimed while still laughing.

He smirked at her, "that will teach you to make fun of my ice cream preferences."

She continued to laugh until he suggested that they make their way back to her apartment. They slowly walked down the street, fingers entwined.

"Thanks for taking me out today," Emma told him.

"No problem," he said, "it beats cleaning."

"I agree," she said with a small chuckle.

"Plus," Killian began slowing down and pulling her closer to him, "I missed you Swan." He pressed his lips against her and was happy when she deepened the kiss and put her arms around his neck. The stood there in the middle of the sidewalk kissing until Killian felt drops of rain falling on his exposed arms and neck.

"It's raining," Emma whispered in a slightly dazed voice.

"Aye," he said capturing her lips one more time not bothered by the light rain drops.

When the rain starting to pick up Emma pulled away, "We should get back." Killian nodded his head silently and grabbed onto her hand again.

As they made their way towards her building the rain really picked up and they found themselves running the last few blocks hand In hand and laughing.

When they reached her door both were soaked completely through. He leaned in and kissed her again. "I should go."

"You don't have to," she said between breathless kisses.

Killian stopped for a moment and looked her directly in the eye. "Are you sure?" he questioned.

"Yes," she told him. In a flash his lips were on hers again with renewed fervor. She opened the door and they nearly tumbled to the floor.

They peeled each others wet clothes off as they made their way to the bedroom their lips rarely parting. Though he had never been in Emma's bedroom before everything about the space screamed Emma. It was decorated in warm colors, and like the living room contained overflowing bookshelves, and a copy of Van Gogh's _Sunflowers_ adorning the wall. He laid her down on the bed and took a moment to admire the gorgeous, nearly naked woman beneath him. "God, you are beautiful." Emma's cheeks flushed red.

They stripped off the remainder of their clothes, kissing, touching, until Killian could think of nothing else but wanting to pleasure her in every way possible. He kissed his way down her neck, feeling himself stiffen as she let out a soft moan. He kissed down her chest and took one breast in his mouth and his hand kneaded the other. When he flicked her nipple with his tongue Emma moaned his name. He pulled away and kissed her again, this time pressing his hips into hers.

Killian spent the next few hours exploring Emma's body completely and making love to her until they both laid, entangled in each others arms, and grinning.


	12. Chapter 12: A Lack of Color

Chapter 12: A Lack of Color

The sound of birds chirping out the bedroom window woke Killian from his peaceful sleep. For a brief moment he felt disoriented as to where he was until he noticed the warm yellow paint on the walls and sunflowers painting hanging on the opposite walls. He looked over at the beautiful blonde sleeping in his arms and smiled. He couldn't remember the last time being so happy to waking up to someone in his bed. No one had meant anything in a long time for him, not since Milah. He was truly happy, and for once was excited about the prospect of what his future held for him. He pulled Emma closer and placed a chaste kiss on her shoulder.

He noticed that his arm was asleep and he tried to move it and in the process woke her up.

She opened her eyes in the dimly lit room of the early morning hours and let out a small groan. Smiling, and in a slightly raspy voice she said, "Morning."

"Morning love," Killian said smiling.

"I'm glad you stayed," she whispered.

"Me too," Killian responded.

"What time is it?" she asked him while rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

Killian glanced at the bedside table, squinting to read the numbers on the clock, "6:30," he said simply.

"Too early for me."

He placed another kiss on the top of her head, "go back to sleep."

She shook her head, "No, I'm already up now. I can never fall back asleep."

For a few more minutes they laid silent but contently, arms and legs completely entwined.

"I haven't been this happy in years," Killian whispered against Emma's hair. He didn't know what came over him or why he said it, but he didn't care. In that moment he wanted Emma to know how special she was to him.

For some reason instead of looking happy, Emma's face became somber and she pulled away from him.

"I'm sorry," he said feeling awkward, "I shouldn't have said that."

"No its fine," she said sitting up slightly in the bed and rubbing her temples in a frustrated manner. "I just didn't want this happen," she added in a whisper.

These words hit Killian like a ton of bricks. He had no idea where this was coming from, especially after such a passionate night and falling asleep in each other's arm.

Killian sat up in bed as well, "Didn't want what to happen?" he questioned, dumbfounded.

"This. Us," Emma said refusing to make eye contact with him. "It's just too much for me."

Killian didn't know what to say. He couldn't pretend that her words didn't hurt and confuse him. They cut him to his core. "I don't understand," he sputtered out.

"I'm sorry," Emma said, "I shouldn't have said anything."

"If that's how you feel, then I'm glad you did." Killian was having a difficult time keeping his voice at an even tone. This all seemed like it was coming out of left field. To say he was confused would have been an underestimate.

The awkwardness hung around them like a thick fog, neither one of them knowing what to say next. Killian stole a glance at her just as she wiped away a tear that had escaped. She brushed it away with her thumb and turned completely away from him, no sitting on the edge of the bed.

"I'm unlovable," she finally said after a few moments of silence.

These words affected Killian more than anything else said between them. "Emma," he said softly moving across the bed and sitting beside her. "You are truly the most incredible woman."

"Please," she pleaded in a pained voice, "don't say anymore." She was avoiding his gaze.

"Why are you doing this?" Killian asked not bothering to keep the hurt out of his voice, "I thought everything was great."

"It was," she said pausing, "It is. This is too hard for me, I can't escape my past. I just can't do it." Again she wiped a tear away and placed her head in her hands.

Killian had no idea what to do. The past few months with Emma had been amazing and now it seemed as if she was willing to throw it all away for no good reason. Last night as he made love to her he could never have envisioned this heavy conversation happening at 6:30 in the morning.

"I don't understand," He said as she shook her head. He could tell that she was getting more and more upset by the minute by tears now streaming down her face.

"I can't talk about it," she choked out.

"Nonsense," he spit out, he was having trouble controlling his anger at this point. "Just tell me what's going on Emma."

"I've been hurt before," she told him, her long blonde hair made a curtain between them and he couldn't see her face.

"Everyone has been hurt before," he said. If that was he excuse Killian thought it was a really lame one.

"I know. I'm not saying that I'm different from anyone else. I'm just saying that I've been hurt…crushed really."

"Please tell me," he said a note of pleading to his voice. "Don't ruin what we have," he added.

"Fine," she said in a frustrated voice. She still didn't turn to look at him as she continued. "Just don't think any less of me."

"I could never…"

She cut him off as she began to speak. "His name was Neal and we were in love. At least I was in love. I don't know what he was…a monster really. He broke my heart."

Killian didn't dare say anything, he just sat there and listened. "He was a thief and a cheat. He lied to me over and over again and I was so stupid that I fell for it every single time. I loved him so much and so fiercely that I took the fall for him and I went to prison for a year. I love everything, my career, my livelihood. I had a promising career and life ahead of me and I threw it all away for a guy. A guy who pretended to love me and abandoned me in my time of need."

He watched as she broke down in front of him. He didn't know how to put in the words the hate that he felt for a man who he never even met. He wanted to rip his throat out.

He rubbed comforting circles on her back and she continued to sob. "He hurt me so much. So much that I'm afraid to fall in love again, to trust again."

"I understand," Killian said to her.

"You don't," she choked out, "I'm so broken."

He pulled her against him and pressed a kiss against her forehead, "You're not broken love."

"I am. I let a man not only ruin my career but I'm letting him ruin the rest of my life as well. I can't believe that I let someone have that much power over me and I'm still letting him have power over me. He's like a disease that I can't get rid of, and I don't know what to do." Her voice no longer shook from emotion, instead she sounded hollow.

"Emma," Killian said grabbing her head pulling her closer to him, "There is stuff in my past that you should know about as well."

* * *

Emma wiped the tears from her eyes and turned to face him. Even after her complete breakdown Killian remained and was still holding her hand and comforting her. She had meant to tell him about the baby, but she just couldn't bring herself to do. It was a conversation for another time and place.

"I was in love before. Her name was Milah and she was honestly amazing," he started. Emma wasn't quite sure where he was going with this but remained silent and listened.

"I lost her. It all happened so fast one day she collapsed and the next the doctor told us that she had cancer and two months to live." He didn't cry but was looking at the ceiling to avoid Emma's sympathetic gaze.

"I was young and in love, I used to feel invincible like I could conquer the world. But I couldn't save Milah. Do you know what it's like to watch someone you love wither away to nothing? And to want nothing more than to trade places with her."

Emma felt fresh tears leaking down her face. She squeezed his.

"I'm sorry," Emma told him. She felt her heard breaking for him.

He let out a frustrated laugh, "She was so good, so good and no one could save her. I let her down." Killian hung his head in shame.

"No," Emma said, "Killian you could never let anyone down."

He pulled her into a hug and both stayed in silence until Killian broke.

"Can we give this a shot Emma?" he questioned, "A real shot?"

"I'm sorry about everything," she said, "This is uncharted territory for me."

"It is for me too," Killian admitted, "but I think we fit Em."

Emma smiled for the first time that morning. "I want to try Killian. You mean so much to me already."

Killian barely let her finish her thought before he pressed his lips against her. "Let's just move on from this. Go back to bed and figure this out later."

Emma kissed him back, "Okay," she said simply.

Note: Sorry for the long break between chapters! I will have another chapter posted later this week! Thanks so much for reading!


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